Archive for November, 2009

this time of year

November 4th, 2009

The days grow short, the night overtakes, and my heart aches for the loss of you.

It’s always early November when I miss you the most.

Not the summers, even though we filled them with love and laughter, snow cones and shrimp. Not the holidays, when we were together more. But the slow increase of darkness always brings a slow increase of memory, and with it, the pang of absence.

I often wonder what you’d think of me now, in my wacky freaky life, but in my heart I know. I can feel you in the wind, loving me from beyond.

I love you, too.

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haunted

November 3rd, 2009

In the dark, in the quiet, in the silence.

Only then can I hear you. Like the wind whipping around me, I can hear you; a roar in the storm, a whisper in the silence. And the hearing of you brings memories, distant like the night sky. Looking up, the stars overwhelm me, tiny beads of light against the darkness of my heart.

You haunt me, and o how I long to be haunted. Such delicious delirious torment.

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dark and twinkling

November 2nd, 2009

After leaving the insane asylum, Nathan needed coffee.

He drove across town, the ghosts of what he’d seen haunting him, cloying and disturbing. He shivered and cranked the heater, and wished the sun wasn’t setting so fast. The echos of tormented screams bounded across his mind, but far worse were the whispers.

Those tiny little voices, hidden in the cracks of his memory.

The eyes of that one girl, so dark, twinkling (mischief? madness?) in spite of everything.

The crooked smile she offered him.

The way she spoke his name… as though… she knew him.

Wait… how had she known his name?

He shook his head, parking in the café lot. He threw open his door and took several deep breaths of the cold, crisp air. Shivering, he ducked into the café and went to the barista. “Coffee, black,” he ordered.

“Yes, Nathan,” she said, and met his gaze with eerily familiar dark eyes.

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the new day

November 1st, 2009

Day births, growing brighter by the moment. The sunlight kisses my eyes, and I open them. I stretch and linger in the warmth of bed, taking deep slow breaths that fill my lungs and recharge my spirit, reconnecting to my body and my Goddess.

Eventually, I rise and don long stripy socks. The chill air wraps around me as I open the back door and step out into the morning. The sun makes stripes on the cool cement, and I move so my stripes align. The synchronicity brings me joy.

I sing a greeting to the day. I gently lower myself into the swing. I watch the breeze and the tall grasses dance.

I am ready.

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